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Anne-Marie Hofmann
Sassy+Loving. Scientific+Spiritual. Nomadic. Always sincere, often wry. Hopefully romantic. Polymath.
Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

I recently read an article published in Forge called What Will You Do With You 1,000 Hours? In sum, the article states the average working American has anywhere between 1,000–2,000 hours of ‘leisure’ time each year. I wise use of that time allows us to achieve many great goals — such as business level proficiency in a new language, running a marathon, or writing a novel.

The key takeaway from the article is that big goals require you to only focus on one at a time, so you must budget your 1,000 hours of leisure time. …

I have a confession to make: I’m a lazy mo’ fo.

Impossible. You’re living space is always clean, you have a billion hobbies, and you eat 90% of your meals at home.

It’s true. I am lazy. To the extreme.

I’ve been awake since 7:00 am. It’s now 8:45 am and I’m still in bed. Because I’m too lazy to stand up. I have nothing pressing on my plate, so why should I need to?


My boyfriend brings it to me in bed…like I said, I’m lazy.

The idea of exercise is excruciating to me. “Home-cooked meals” are often…

Photo by Sydney Sims on Unsplash

In January 2018, I emerged from a 15 month, committed, monogamous relationship with an emotionally abusive narcissist.

That relationship ripped out my soul, leaving me a empty, purposeless pile of flesh. But the lessons I learned from going through that turmoil ultimately gave me the strength to make changes in my life — namely, changes in relationships that truly mattered, like that between father and daughter.

*Let me be very clear: I’m only focusing on one aspect of my father in this article. He is a good man and has many positives.

Dating a narcissist

If you’ve dated a narcissist, you’ll understand that…

Photo by Nadya Spetnitskaya on Unsplash

“I’m about to use the last of the bread,” he says.
“Okie. I’ll make some more tomorrow.”

This exchange between my mate and I might have felt abnormal a few months ago. But today, it’s a normal part of my routine.

In The Time Before [COVID-19], it was a rarity for a modern Westerner to make bread every three days. Why wouldn’t you buy it at the supermarket along with everything else?

In The Time Before, people didn’t need to know how to cook a decent meal. Isn’t that what restaurants are for?

In The Time Before, we didn’t need…

Photo: Toa Heftiba/Unsplash

With the current COVID-19 pandemic the entire world is at least four weeks into social-isolation.

Except America. They re-opened.

Yes, well, America is what we refer to as a “massive dumpster fire”. I have confidence they’ll close again in about a week.

For many, social-isolation means being completely alone; for most it means spending more time with our partners and families than we’d ever imagined. It’s a struggle my parents encountered when they retired, and one I dealt with in my mid-twenties when my then-partner and I both worked from home.

My parents worked through their troubles, and their relationship…

To have healthy relationships

If you’re a child of the 80’s having gone through your teen years circa late 90's/early 2000’s, this article is especially intended for you. We are the generation of non-boundary setting. We flat out don’t know how to do it. It’s not our fault — it’s a skill we were never taught — but it is our responsibility to learn to draw that proverbial line in the sand.

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The media that reared us engendered us to believe ridiculous notions; a perfect partner doesn’t need cultivation, he knows what you want — he obsesses over the subtleties of your behavior to…

Photo by Allie Smith on Unsplash

Over the past decade, a social media-fueled movement has gathered steam: one in the art of self-love. Proponents of the movement claim by learning to love ourselves, we’ll create a societal shift toward peace and caring.

But most of us don’t have a clue what self-love is.

Says you. After a bad week of enduring my boss screaming at me, I go home, pour myself a bottle of wine and drink it in the tub. With a large bar of chocolate.

That’s love! I deserve that.

That isn’t love. That’s wallowing in self-pity.

Photo by Toimetaja tõlkebüroo on Unsplash

I was about ten when she flooded the bottom floor of her home. She left the kitchen tap running overnight; an understandable mistake. She had to have been around 75…76. Chalk it up to old age. These things happen.

The second occurrence, in less than a year, was cause for concern.

A visit to a specialist informed us that Nana had a brain tumor that had been growing for an estimated 25 years.

Nana lived for another ten or twelve years post-surgery, but I won’t pretend they were happy years. The surgery only slowed her steady decline into dementia, rather…

I originally wrote this on January 2nd but I like to sit on things for a day or two before I edit and post, thus it is January 4th. But pretend it’s January 2nd. For timelines and such.

Photo by Fil Mazzarino on Unsplash

Yesterday, I ran.

Whoop dee doo. What do you want, a fucking cookie?

You don’t understand — I don’t run.

For years I have rhapsodized against running.

A few weeks back I was at a party chatting with some folks. They were discussing the idea of putting together a group for a Tough Mudder. “I’d love to do one,” I exclaimed, “but…

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Lately, I’ve had a bit of writer’s block, and this one felt like an easy win. And sometimes, an easy win is needed to get the creative juices flowing again.

Thus I take you down the crazy path that is my brain on Harry Potter…

During a current re-read of the series, I went on a Google search to look up something about one of the characters. I can’t even remember what I was searching for, but in doing so, I stumbled upon several Quora threads discussing potential horrifying implications of the Potter universe.

Over and over again I saw…

Anne-Marie Hofmann

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